Why is it called a midlife crisis? Why not a midlife awakening? Is it so wrong, after years of following the rules that our parents, teachers and society has laid out before us to finally wake up and take back our youthful wonder and engagement in the world? You often hear he/she is crazy they are acting like a child. Why does he need to buy a fast car? Why is she working out all the time? What do they have to prove?
In our quest to place things in a tidy little box is it possible that our comments are laden with jealously and discomfort because we too long to be adventurous and live yet we don't have the guts to do it. When did getting older mean depleting the zest from our life. How can we be a good example for our children or the world at large if we lose sight of the wonder that is around us? Can we not work hard, be good people and have fun too?
We cite things like affairs, car purchases and exercise as hallmarks that define alterations that are taking place. But let's get real here, people do all of those things at a younger age; maybe the difference is when we are younger we can't go out and buy an expensive car but many of us sure as heck would if we had the means to do so. Humans are fallible we make messes, me make mistakes.
I know you, like myself sometimes wish we could have avoided all of the challenges and learned the lessons we needed to without a mess, without pain. We make gigantic asses out of ourselves, we do it from birth until death. I understand the idea that we should be older and wiser but perhaps it's time we bag that cliché and focus on the fact that the human experience is wrought with pitfalls, ditches, and twisting turning patches that can lead you into Utopia or a mire of crap. Sometimes it's a little bit of both; heaven and hell intermixed. The journey is different for each of us. We can judge, place blame, shake our fingers or we can just accept we belong to the same darn club.
"Here comes 40. I'm feeling my age and I've ordered the Ferrari. I'm going to get the whole mid-life crisis package." -Keanu Reeves
Is a midlife crisis a construct we create to give a disease like reason to something we just can't nail down? Is it possible there is a bit of midlife awareness going on and that awareness, even if it is an urging for nothing more than for us to live, explore and venture out do have new experiences is just what the soul craves. Clearly, we find discomfort with relationships altering, people pursuing new things, life being shaken up in ways we don't understand. And, if this shaking happens to us, we want reason, answers and we relish labels so, sticking a shiny title to it does the trick for us and everyone around us. Blow off the labels and embrace your insatiable desire to grow and go with it. We are human, we are supposed to keep evolving so remeber that if you feel judged let the opinions roll off your back like water.
I think the greatest lesson on the topic of midlife growth and transition is acceptance. Accepting changes, unseen forces and the push and machination of the soul. You have one life to live and I find it doubtful at the end of the road you will regret living, even if it is messy, though I can guarantee you will regret it if you don't live at all.
7 Quick tips to help you get the most out of your Mid-life (Crisis) Awakening
1. Explore something new that has always been in the back of your mind.
2. Be okay with letting go of old goals that don't feel good anymore.
3. Don't be afraid to release friendships that no longer align with your new path.
4. Volunteer your time.
6. Learn to say no to people and things that deplete you.
7. Have fun, if you are not having fun you are not living life.
I would love to hear your thoughts on the topic, please comment below.